Unwritten Rules of Relationships

To be honest, there ain’t no rules when it comes to relationships but the title sounds catchy so let’s work with it. Here are some things I believe to be true.

Relationships are tough and even though we might think relationships shouldn’t be defined, it always helps to know some things.

So, here I am writing this piece while listening to ‘Tum Ho’ by Mohit Chauhan.

‘Yeah, still a favourite.’

Okay, enough shite.

1. Little things matter.

Little things that reflect you care about a person go a long way in their overall happiness.

Things like;

  • Making them their favourite meal
  • complimenting them when you think they do something nice
  • flirting with them like it’s the first time,
  • watching their favourite movie with them
  • Stopping by their favourite pastry shop to get them a treat
  • Surprise kisses and hugs

The list is endless and different for each one of us. The bottom line is you know your sweetie and what makes them balloon up with happiness.
And you do all this just because you wanna see a smile on their face. It takes 2 minutes tops to notice something genuine in them.

Look what I found ⤵

See, little things matter.

They will always matter.

If you understand your partner, you will always know what to do.

2. Don’t take them for granted.

You’re lying if you say you don’t take anyone for granted. We all at some point in time take our loved ones for granted. And it’s fine unless the behaviour is repetitive and you don’t realise it from time to time. So, make it a point to ask yourself this question more often- “Am I taking my loved ones for granted?”.

No matter whoever it is, your family or friends, if the answer to the question is ‘Yes’;

Make up for it. Talk to them that you’ve realised and make up for it.

3. Possessiveness kills a relationship.

Jealousy, possessiveness and insecurity may sometimes bubble up in each one of us, but the difference is how you guys manage it. And that is all that makes the difference between a healthy and an unhealthy relationship. Possessiveness will kill attraction in a relationship.

Slowly, but surely.

Think about it, who would you rather be with: a clingy person who keeps a leash on you because he/she “cares”; or the one who lets you be yourself because he/she trusts you and wants to see you grow.

Possessiveness is not synonymous with “more care”

It only reflects how many struggles a person has with their insecurities and ability to trust.

4. Trust.

Trust is the only way.

I wish there was a way to know a person before you commit to them and be vulnerable to them but there isn’t!

Trust is the only way.

You will have to completely and fully (not blindly) place your heart into the other person’s hands and trust them to not break it. There’s no guarantee, there never was. Life doesn’t come with guarantees and that’s the part why it is beautiful. And if they have walked all over your heart time and again, darling, you know what to do.

You cannot control relationships. And when you do, they die.

5. Communication is the key.

You’re angry and you’ve blurted something out in the rage. You cannot take your words back. You will regret but the damage will be done. Words can harm in ways you cannot fathom. And so can they heal when communicated properly. Misunderstandings arise in every relationship but how they are handled counts.

Instead of ignoring and complaining in a relationship, try to communicate on a deeper level.

6. Quit.

Life is too short to compromise on love. (click)=>Link

If your relationship doesn’t nourish your soul, doesn’t help you grow and keeps you constricted and small, just leave. Sometimes, people are good but their love for you isn’t. Human beings have a tendency to idealise what they have. Often times, it is more difficult to leave an unhealthy relationship because you are convinced that everything wrong is your fault. Your lungs wouldn’t know the taste of fresh air until you’ve left the polluted city. ⬅ [Link].

If you think you can’t share emotionally with the person you love or if you two aren’t compatible, do both of yourselves a favour and leave. Love can right every wrong in your life but wrong love could destroy you.

7. Don’t lose yourself.

Many a time, people commit so much to the other person that they lose their own individuality. If your world starts revolving around the person you love, love won’t stay for long. Because your individuality was what made them fall in love with you in the first place. If your life changes completely after getting into a relationship, you’re losing yourself. And there is nothing worse.

Don’t stop seeing your regular friends or pursuing your interests. Strike a balance. It’s love, not devotion!

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